The phrase “social media ruined love” is one that gets thrown around, and can showcase any aspect of a relationship that lacks traditional values. However, the thing that really ruined love is modern romcoms.
A very cliche storyline for a romcom (romantic comedy) is the Cinderella type-story. The protagonists’ life starts off relatively unfortunate, a glimmer of hope arises, then at the climax, they go downhill deeper than how their story started, but has a happy ending.
Unless done well, that storyline pushes unrealistic expectations for love; the dynamic and conflicts never seem realistic. Most modern romcoms seem to focus more on being funny than romantic.
For example, in Anyone But You (2023), female lead Bea (Sydney Sweeney), has only one personality trait: not liking the male lead, Ben (Glen Powell). Along with the fact that the conflict sprouted from a miscommunication, the sexualization of their fake relationship was borderline nauseating. To compliment the gross banter, none of it felt meaningful. Maybe it’s due to the original miscommunication, but a grave is miles deeper than the extent of their bond.
It’s also a shame since Powell and Sweeney had good chemistry. Either the acting was mediocre or the script was, but something wasn’t right.
The banter was so artificial. It doesn’t feel meaningful to the blossoming of their relationship; it just gives Timmy Tuffknuckles, or at least attempts to be.
The normalization of dry quips is borderline parasocial. In my opinion, the standard for a romantic relationship is all about connection. Which may seem obvious, but with the route some of these movies that are supposed to mirror real life, a meaningful relationship isn’t all that evident.
But of course, the spectrum of interpretation and nuance films hold is infinite, especially romance movies where symbolism can be unlimited. Between music choice, prop placement, and dialogue, the exposition is endless.
Hence, the entirety of Anyone But You overall seems dry. Sure, the comedy part works well, but it’s hard to tell if that’s due to the movie itself or lack of romance.
But thankfully, there are romcoms that accurately portray the complex relationships between a man and woman. How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days (2003) is a picture perfect example of chemistry; but not a picture perfect couple.
The lies and deceit on both ends somehow adds depth to the relationship. Andie (Kate Hudson) and Ben (Matthew McConaughey) create their story based on deceivement.
But the difference between the two movies is how the deceivement is portrayed. In How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days, such deceivement is posed between the two leads. But in Anyone But You, the ruse is for the rest of the characters. The focus on putting up a front between each other focuses on their own bond, while the performance for others centers around observance.
The patience between Andie and Ben had pinpoint accuracy. Since the movie’s entire theme is ragebait, their arguments seemed actually human. It seemed real. Their chemistry transcended looks and banter; it reached their gazes, their smiles, and their presence. The joy and comfort they have around each other didn’t give artificial, or acting. It gave love.
That’s why the normalization of movies such as Anyone But You damages people’s idea of love. It presses the objective that humor should be the main focus, and not connection. The more society focuses on love, the less social media will ruin it.
